Essential Loss

In Yesterday’s post, “Human Being Eternal”, I wrote about how, in the process of transitioning from childhood, we begin to lose our ability to just “be” as we become more and more identified with an internal judge. This process of becoming identified with this mind-made entity, and the seeming loss of our ability to experience our innate eternity, is what we were led to believe is all just a part of becoming a mature, responsible adult.

But that eternal being is not as lost as we think: it’s simply being stifled behind this veil of a mind-made entity of what we think it means to be a human adult. Children are much more closely identified with their eternal nature yet they have no way of knowing or appreciating it. As teenagers, we begin indulging our humanity by either conforming with or railing against expectations (or some measure of both). As adults, we have the opportunity to break free of those imposing expectations in order to discover what it is we were meant to do before we were led astray by thoughts of what it is we were “supposed” to do.

The trouble is that no one told us that part, and without even knowing it’s a possibility, how can we make that choice? Instead, we get more and more rooted in our judgments and more and more unhappy. We want the world to change and adhere to those expectations that we were led to believe were the ultimate guide to happiness, but it is that “guide to happiness” that is actually the root cause of our unhappiness. In letting go of expectations, we release that judge from it’s self-imprisonment, and we set our spirits free.

We find ourselves on a mountain-top and are able to survey the landscape with clear eyes. We recognize the beauty and the ugliness, but we also see how the ugliness creates the beauty and how it’s all relative. In that moment, there is forgiveness and gratitude for all of it. A healing occurs within ourselves, and we no longer feed the world with negativity. We are one less voice of dissension, and we bring peace to each of our actions and responsibilities. We are able to know what it is we are supposed to do beyond and thought or concept of what it is we “should” do or “want” to do.

We are able to be the space for others to burn themselves out in futile protest, because without someone to fight against, they are sure to figure it out for themselves. By not resisting or supporting another’s mind-made story of hurt or frustration or pain, we no longer strengthen that mind-made judge that plagues this contemporary society we live in.

There are real issues in the world outside of the ones created by our individual “wanting” and “needing”, and without those “monkey’s on our backs” we can begin to bring healing to those more grave issues that plague humanity and threaten our existence as a whole. By serving in that way, we find more fulfillment than we ever could have found by achieving what it was we believed was the idyllic life of a human adult.

When we are identified with our internal judge, we may at times look at children and envy how oblivious they are to the rules and judgments of this “grown up” world we live in. Their lives can seem so carefree, and we know they have no way of understanding just how special this time is in their lives. Perhaps we feel a sense of sadness in our recognition that someday they too will lose that innocence in their initiation into adulthood.

When we look at those children and recognize or envy their innocence, it’s really just our own eternal being longing to be recognized and expressed. It is that essential process of “losing” our innate eternity that allows us to be able to recognize it again as adults. And because we’ve been on both sides of the coin, we are able to absolutely treasure it this time around. It’s like “returning home after a long journey and seeing it clearly for the first time”.
 

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